Frankly, all this talk of Turducken is just plain pissing me off. Those damn Cajuns and their crazy food… This is after all the same people who put chicken, seafood and pork into their rice.
Following hard on the heels of this obsession with creating the avian equivalent of a haggis are these wankers (hat tip: Mr Green). Apparently, stuffing the breasts of dozens of birds into the cavity of another, bigger bird is all the rage among the toffs. And they’d have to be toffs. Anyone who’s anyone knows that the thighs are where all the goodness is.
Anyhow. Enough ranty-ranty.
The problem is that these people simply aren’t thinking big enough. If you really want to create a gourmet dish not to be matched then you need to start talking about protected game. Now that’s thinking big.
So… I got to thinking. You want a big meal? Something to seriously impress the Whippington-Smythes? Then stuff a freaking elephant. With a Hippo. With a Zebra. With a Hyena. With a Baboon. With a Springbok. With a Sloth. With a Meercat (maybe two). And then stuff the Meercat with a baby Lion. Oh, and stuff the baby Lion with a Mars bar and deepfry the whole shebang.
Other suggestions are welcomed.
20 December, 2007 at 7:56 pm
In this age of conspicuous consumption, perhaps you should be looking for more than a lump of dead meat? Something that is, well, art?
Take one shark in formaldehyde and stuff with a diminishing selection of endangered species, finishing –naturally enough– with a small flightless bird…
Merry Christmas!
20 December, 2007 at 8:48 pm
You’re still not thinking rich and toffer enough. Stuff a blue whale with elephants, etc…
21 December, 2007 at 6:40 am
Stuff the planet with humans.
21 December, 2007 at 7:39 am
There was the famous Roman recipe, perfect for Saturnalia: stuff an ox with a cow, then with a goat, then a goose, then a chicken, then a duck, then a guinea fowl, then a thrush, then a sparrow; and stuff the sparrow with a single olive. Roast the whole thing slowly for two days … then eat the olive and throw everything else away.
22 December, 2007 at 9:01 am
Does it come with sides or is that extra?